What is your name : Christi

Who do you want the poem written for: My Dad, Ross

Why do you want the poem written: I would like the poem written for Father's Day 2005

What style of poem would you prefer (happy, sad, romantic etc.): Happy; a little nostalgic; a them of looking ahead to a bright future

Please choose which package you would prefer : Unique

Would you like a copy of the handwritten drafts : Yes

What are the key messages you would like to send: I would like to send the following key messages:
* Gratitude for my Dad's unending patience; his way of being 'cranky' at my brother (Scott) and I for what we had done, not who we were and for never holding a grudge.

* The depth of my love for him (I would go to the end of the earth for him and he for my brother and I).

* That my Dad is a true 'rock' for my brother and I. This is a term we often use with my Dad.

* That I deeply respect him as my Dad as well as my friend.

* Dad has always been an incredibly honest person and taught this to my brother and I as well.

* Dad likes a drink and a good chat and has always been there for my brother and I at any time, regardless of what it was we had to tell him.

* Dad has always been very protective of me and is a very proud father.

* I would like to make reference to how hard he has worked his entire life. My Dad's father (Pop) was the town drunk and never had any money to support his family (my Nan, my Uncle Lin and Aunty Joy). As a consequence, my Dad started selling newspapers at 9 years old, finished school in Year 10 and went to work for a bank. In 1970 Dad volunteered to go to the Vietnam War and the money he earned as a soldier, he sent back to his mother to help support the family. After he left the army he was able to get a cheap 'service loan' and bought himself a block of land in (withheld) which ended up being a springboard for his future financial success. After leaving the army he became an accountant, skills in which he and my mum used to start a photographic business along with their business partners. This business ran extremely successfully for 21 years until it was sold, along with the land, for a lot of money. The point of this information is that Dad came from very humble beginnings and worked so hard to make a good life for his family. My brother and I were both educated in private schools and many sacrifices were made for our educations. The down side to all of this is that my parents separated in November 2004 after working very hard for the family and also for a comfortable retirement. Unfortunately, my mum is a very difficult person and Dad could no longer live with her behaviours. This was a sad and difficult period for my Dad but he has recently found a lovely lady, Sue, who he is sharing his time with. They are currently on a four month overseas holiday.

* I would like to make reference to the deep bond of trust that my Dad and I have - me for him and him for me. Dad and I are the best of friends.

Do you have any funny, sad, happy, embarrassing or otherwise memorable moments that you would like to share

: My predominant memories of my Dad include:

* The many special nights we spent at our home in (withheld), when Dad would cook a barbecue for the family. Dad loves to cook a barbecue and he would particularly like it when I would take him a glass of red wine as he cooked and we would just talk about our lives, my future, did I have anything I wanted to talk to him about etc and he always genuinely wanted to know and would give me his complete attention, even as he hand fed our poodles their barbecued meat. These are really special memories for me and now that Dad no longer lives in the family home I really miss chatting to him as he cooks a barbecue. Dad misses these times too.

* Another memory I have is of Dad always being so kind to the animals we have had, predominantly poodles. In allowing us to have dogs, Dad taught us the responsibility of caring for someone else and also how to treat animals properly. As a result both my brother and I have a deep affection for dogs, particularly poodles. In case you need this information, here are the poodles names and the order in which they came into our home:
1. Sooky (deceased - old age) 2. Buddy (deceased - Dad accidentally ran over him) 3. Lucky (still with us & he adores Dad) 4. Cadbury (deceased - mauled by a red heeler) 5. Mandela (deceased - run over) 6. Nelson (still with us)
6. Grace (still with us). Dad used to fish every Wednesday and loved to take a few poodles with him and they loved to go!

* A good memory I have (though not at the time) is Dad asking my brother and I to work in their business during school holidays. Dad taught us a strong and positive work ethic and how to deal with customers/the public to get a good outcome. My brother and I didn't like to spend our holidays working at the time and used to complain a fair bit (even though we got paid) but looking back, the basis of my work ethic today was formed during those times and I am very grateful because it has helped me immensely in my working life now.

* A not so pleasant memory (even now) and I'm not at all thankful is one hot summer day in (withheld) (a coastal town) during school holidays, Dad had a brilliant idea (not!). Dad had made for my brother and I a quite heavy steel type wagon that we could hook onto the back of our bikes and put an esky in it (also heavy). Dad has some signwriting done on the wagon and it was called the 'Watermelon Wagon'. The idea was to fill the esky with ice and fresh watermelon and pineapple, then ride out the beaches in (withheld) and try and sell this fruit to people on the beach for $0.50 a piece. My brother and I hated it and persevered for two days in the heat. We sold two pieces of watermelon and after a 'fruitless' day of labor we eventually called Dad at work - we were close to tears and begged him to come out to the Beach and please bring us back to town. Dad, hearing the torment in our voices, conceded that the 'Watermelon Wagon' might not have been a good idea and he came out to get us in his old Suzuki jeep, packed our bikes and the damn wagon into the back and took us home. We were ever so grateful but have never forgotten the torture of those two days. Every now and then we still talk about it and we do have a laugh.

* I guess a sad and memorable moment I have of Dad (and I'm not proud of it) is when I was involved in a very destructive relationship with a man who was abusing drugs (I wasn't though). Dad knew from the outset that the man was no good for me and one Christmas he refused him entry to their home. Briefly, I finally told Dad one day the extent of debt I was in due to allowing this man to manipulate me and pretty much steal my money that he wanted. Dad and my brother drove 3 hours to where we were living and completely got me out of a very nasty personal and financial situation (the money he gave me I had to pay back, there were never any free rides with Dad). To make it worse, after getting out of the situation the first time I went back to the same old, same old and got myself into financial trouble again. Again, no questions asked my Dad came to the rescue again and sorted me out so that my future credit rating was not damaged. Again, I repaid him the money and thankfully came to my senses and did not return to the relationship. I'll never forget how Dad turned up to help me at my darkest time, there were no recriminations or 'I told you so's', he just knew I needed help and trusted him to help me. We had many talks about this once I was free of the situation and my mistakes still affect me now, but Dad was there as my 'rock' like he always is. I would really like to thank him for being there for me and for the support he gave me in the months following the closure of that relationship.

* A very happy memory I have is Anzac Day (April 25th) this year. For only the third time since returning from Vietnam, my Dad decided to march on Anzac Day. Anzac Day is a day of great national pride here in Australia. Dad was marching with a World War 2 veteran of the Battle of Stalingrad (amazing in itself) and also of the French Foreign Legion. The old soldier's name is Eddie and Dad met him late last year on his travels. My husband (Bruce) and I arranged to meet Dad in (withheld) (the town he marched in that day) to watch him march as we are very proud of him. On the way to (withheld), Dad called me on my mobile phone and asked me if I would like to march alongside him. I was floored by his offer as I know how proud he is of the Anzac tradition but also of himself and his fellow diggers. Of course I said yes. When we arrived in (withheld) we all met for a cup of coffee before the march and Dad said to me that he had something special he wanted to give me. Dad opened his hand and gave to me his dog tags that he wore during the Vietnam War, still in their original condition. I probably still don't quite understand the enormity of the gift but I was so touched and have worn them each day since. Then we I marched beside Dad that day with my arm linked in his I had to hold off my tears as I was so deeply proud of him and of being his daughter. It's a really special memory for me and I hope to march with him again next year if he asks me.

* Another memory I have is of Dad's love for all things camping, fishing and shooting. We never had proper family holidays due to my parent's commitment to their business, but when the chance did arise for Dad to get away he would take my brother and I camping. One time, there was Dad, my brother (Scott) and his friend Peter (business parter at the time) and we all went camping on the (withheld) River near (withheld) (dad's town of birth). For the entire week it rained and we were stuck in a little camper van that only got smaller with each day. For five days we sat inside playing a game we all love called '500' - it's a bit like Eucha. Dad taught us the game of '500' which I still love. Dad also taught me to hate camping and fishing! I will avoid camping of any sort now at all costs and will only go fishing with Dad if he really, truly wants me to. My Dad is a mad fisherman and for 22 years he fished the (withheld) River with his old mate, Lindsay. Fishing was my Dad's way of getting away from it all and he never came home without a great meal of fish for the family - something he took great pride in.

* Probably one of the best memories I have of Dad is the night of 27 November 1990 when he took me to my second John Farnham concert. John Farnham is a very famous singer here in Australia and I have adored him since I was 12 years old (I'm now 30 years old). Before the concert Dad said to me "Hey, wouldn't it be great if we could get you backstage to meet John after the concert?." My response was that of course that wasn't possible, we were only two people from the country and why would he want to see us. To cut a long story short, Dad made it possible that night for us to get backstage passes (no bribery was involved) to meet John Farnham and his band. I was 15 years old and thought all my dreams had come true. It was such an incredible buzz to be meeting my idol, whom I still adore, and second to my marriage, probably the best event of my life. Dad taught me such a huge lesson that night that I have only realised in the last few years as I have become older. Dad taught me that it doesn't matter who you are or where you're from, if you have the will to do something difficult you can do it, you can get it done - just persevere. I live by that now and there's not many challenges I face that I don't refer back to that lesson and I find a way to get the job done. Dad made me realise that I can have a go at anything and succeed if I want it enough.

* For some reason when I think of my Dad I see a picture of him sitting in his lounge chair with a 'whisky and dry' in his hand, watching the evening news with a poodle on his lap.

* My sad memory surrounding Dad is mostly to do with his relationship with my mum. Dad was by no means a perfect husband but my god he tried. My mum is such a difficult person and in the last 10 years of their 32 year marriage she bombarded him regularly with insults of the most vile kind (including attacking him for his service in Vietnam and calling him a coward, something that cut him to the core). My Dad loved my mum very much for a long time and it's probably why he stayed so long. Dad tried to deal with her and was more understanding than my mum deserved. Late last year he left her and though it was hard and still is hard for him, he has never been happier. Dad said to me "I have to be happy to go or happy to stay, and I'm no longer happy to stay." I encouraged my Dad to leave my mum and am so pleased I did so because he is his old self again and 'happy as a pig in mud' (one of his favourite sayings). Dad looks physically well again, has lost a lot of weight, is ecstatic in his new relationship and again, in his words, he looks "flasher than a gold toothed rat". I'm just so pleased that my Dad is living his life again rather than existing through it with my mum. I wanted Dad to enjoy his retirement after working so hard for so long and that wasn't happening with my mum and was never going to due to her mental illness (undiagnosed and mum thinks there's nothing wrong with her). Dad's future is so bright now and currently he's enjoying a fabulous overseas holiday with his partner, Sue. My brother and I have both met Sue and thinks she's lovely. We are happy he has found a nice partner to share his time with.

* Another memory I have of Dad is his kindness to his family and to people in the community who need a helping hand. Dad inherited this trait from his mother (Pat - my nan) who was a hard working, good humoured and huge hearted lady. When Dad owned the photographic business they traded in second-hand cameras. Often, people who were down and out would come to him and try to sell him cameras with no resale value and were quite obviously junk. Dad would not buy the camera from them, rather he would take $20.00 from his own pocket and give it to the person in need. Of course the person would promise to come back to repay him 'next week' but Dad knew he would not see the money again. Dad would give them the money anyway.

* Another thing about my Dad is his strong sense of family. There is nothing Dad won't do for his family, this includes his brother, sister, in-laws and their children. Dad, or Uncle Ross, is much loved by his nieces and nephews and respected as well. Dad treats everyone fairly and is often quite hard on my brother and I as well as close nieces and nephews. If Dad didn't like an attitude he would tell us as well as why and explain why that attitude was offensive to people and wouldn't get us far. It's a bit like Dad noticed opportunities to mould us into better people and he did so, even if he was unpopular at the time. Dad has helped many family members with many problems and he is much loved for always being there, no matter what.

* One last thing - my Dad doesn't often call me Christi (the name he chose for me). For about the last 20 years my Dad has always called me 'Blue' due to the red hair I had at the time. My hair is more blonde than red now but he still calls me Blue and this is like his special name for me and no one else is allowed to call me that - well I don't like them to anyway but I do let my Uncle Lin (dad's brother) use it sometimes.

* One more thing - my Dad gave me the most beautiful wedding. It wasn't excessive by any means, in fact quite modest by today's standards, but it was so special. Dad made sure I didn't have to worry about anything on the day and had a small army of helpers to organise all those last minute jobs. When I was ready to walk down the aisle with Dad, we walked through the church doors and standing on Dad's left hand side was a family friend holding my toy black poodle, Nelson, whom she had made a doggy coat and tails for. Nelson had been beautifully groomed and looked sooo cute. So, Dad and I set off down the aisle with Dad holding little Nelson in the crook of his left arm and me on his right arm. It looked a little unusual with both my Dad and my dog giving me away, but my goodness did it get some smiles. When I look back at the video of Dad and I walking down the aisle and footage of him during the service, he was so proud that day and I was too. The money used for our wedding was actually my Dad's small inheritance he received from his mum when she died. I was always close to my nan and then she got dementia. It was particularly special for me to find out later than in fact my nan had paid for my wedding.

* Probably one of the most embarrassing moments that involves my Dad is when not long into mine and my husband's relationship we went to my Aunty Barb's and Uncle Ken's farm, north of (withheld) for my Dad's 50th birthday party. It was to be a big night and we were all looking forward to it. Now, Bruce and I had only been going out for about four months and to add to it, our relationship was long distance. Bruce lived in Sydney and me in (withheld) which equated to about a four hour drive to see each other and we both worked. When Bruce and I arrived at the farm it was a relief because we hadn't seen each other for six weeks and we thought we might have a chance to be alone. After saying our hellos, we walked about 100 metres away from house, down near a shed to give each other a long hug (nothing inappropriate) as we were in full view of my family. Dad called out to Bruce in a joking way "Hey, take your hands off my daughter". Bruce and I laughed and kept holding hands, chatting and having a hug. Dad calls out again "I said, hey, take your hands off my daughter" and the next thing we heard was a huge boom. Dad and my uncle Ken, after having a few beers, thought it might be amusing to shoot a double barrel shot gun (well) over our heads. However, I was not amused and deeply embarrassed because of my Dad. I thought, oh my god, Bruce will think we're redneck hillbillies with my Dad doing something like that. Dad and I had a big argument that day as I was so angry at him for embarrassing me like he did. Dad and my Uncle Ken thought themselves very amusing. We laugh now and the story came up at our wedding reception, along with an oversized double barrel shotgun that my Uncle Lin made especially for the occasion and my Dad's speech.

Do you have any other comments or thoughts : Hi Allen and nice to meet you.

I hope that I have given you enough information to write a poem about my Dad. Please let me know if you want me to walk down memory lane a little further. I guess the main thing I would like to come out in the poem is just how much I love my Dad for all of the above mentioned reasons. My Dad is a man of honour and strength and his love for my brother and I is truly unconditional. Dad has been just as good to my brother as he has been to me, though the bonds he has with both of us are different but no less strong. Really, if my Dad died today I would feel like the world has fallen from beneath me. I would be a bit like a boat without an anchor. Even though I am married now to a wonderful man and he is my world, my Dad is still such an important part of my life and knowing he is there is a very reassuring and calming thing for me. I would really like to thank my Dad for always being there for me; for letting me know that no matter what he will love me; for teaching me to dream and not give up; for being my best friend; for moulding me into the person I have become.

After I read your first draft, if there is anything else I have forgotten I will let you know, if that's okay. There is no real rush with the poem as I don't need it until Father's Day this year, which will be early September. I would just like to get it organised early and ready for my Dad when he returns from his overseas trip.

Thank you for writing this poem for me and my Dad and I look forward to receiving the first draft. If there is anything further you need, please let me know.

Kind regards

Christi

The King of Hearts

Hello, my wonderful father, my heart is full and I have a lot to say, and I don't think I'll get a better opportunity, after all, today, well, it is Father's Day. And I wanted to thank you for your unending patience, and for your way of being 'cranky' at my brother and I, because it's always for what we've done, not who we are, I'll explain that further (or at least I'll try). You see, you never hold a grudge, and I've never really said just how wonderful you are, but if my love for you were a distance, well, then it'd be further than the furthest star. You've been a true rock to Scott and I, but more than a Dad, you've been our friend, and you'll always have our respect, our love, long after these earthbound journeys have their end. You've always been an incredibly honest person, and honesty has been just one of the lessons that you've taught, but you've always been there for both of us, so we'd like to thank you for your unconditional support. I know you like a drink and a good chat, but you've always given us an ear that'll understand, and I know you've been a very protective and proud father, but to be honest, you're the best Dad in all this land. And I know your father wasn't quite like that, in truth, he never killed the dragon that lived inside, but from selling newspapers, to the Vietnam war, I know that you have been a great source of pride. And you worked long and hard all your life, you made a great success out of Gotofast, and I'm so sorry that you and Mom separated, but I guess some things are not meant to last. But you made many sacrifices for our educations, because you wanted to give us the very best of starts, and of all the 52 cards in any one pack, we're very lucky, we drew the Kings of Hearts. And I miss our little chats by the BBQ, and I miss bringing you a glass of red wine, but I know we've built this deep bond of trust, and that will last beyond the very last line. You always taught us to love our animals, especially our poodles (just too many to list), just know the moments we've shared have been precious, I know Sooky, Buddy, Cadbury and Mandela are sorely missed. And I know we complained a bit at the time, but working in the school holidays made us realize, and those days have formed the basis of my work ethic today, although I guess by now, this comes as no surprise. And we'll never forget those two torturous days, I think the Watermelon Wagon was ahead of it's time, we remember begging you to pick us up from Surf Beach, but you still managed to put reason in our rhyme. And as you know, I've taken some wrong turns, and at times, my universe became totally dark, but you've always been there to rescue me, to save me, and to re-ignite my future, all it took was you, my spark. And never with recriminations or 'I told you so', you just gave me your unconditional support, your love, and I know I've been blessed to have shared you, I know that I've been blessed with your love. And I've never felt prouder marching by your side, and I've worn your dog tags every day since then, and if you ever ask me to march with you, I'll say, without hesitation, yes, where and when?. And even though I hate camping and fishing, endless games of 500 in Cooma saw to that, but I did get to meet my hero, John Farnham, so to you Dad, I take off my hat. Because you taught me that everything is possible, and now I find a way, because you gave me the will, and I know you stayed with Mom as long as you could, but at the end of the day, she's really quite ill. But I'm so glad you've found your happiness, because in this life, you've given enough blood, and now you're 'flashier than a gold toothed rat', and you really do look as 'happy as a pig in mud'. And we all think Sue is really lovely, and now, we really do think you're on the right track, so maybe all those $20 for dodgy cameras weren't wasted, because spiritually, I think you're getting them right back. But happiness is nothing less than you deserve, because you've done so much for the whole family, and Dad I just wanted to thank you for being you, you've made my world a great place to be. And thankfully, it wasn't a shotgun wedding, but I do want to thank you for the most special day of my life, just know that you're still my anchor, my King of Hearts, even though, after being shot at, Bruce made me his wife. So thanks for teaching me how to dream, thanks for teaching me to get up after a fall, Dad, just know that I love you very much, you're the King of Hearts, to Blue, the greatest one of all.

Copyright www.agiftofpoetry.com 2008

Allen Jesson

Comments:

Christi kindly replied:

"Hi Allen :o)

How wonderful you are at your craft. I love the poem and you captured my Dad well and how much my brother and I love him.

I know he will love it.

I can't think of any way that I would like the poem changed, it's perfect.

I know you must hear this all the time from your customers, but when I read the poem I could feel the emotion well up but also I had many smiles.

I love how you wrote that the 'Watermelon Wagon' was ahead of its time. I
have no objections to you using my story or the poem on your website.

My heartfelt thanks to you again and I will now wait to hear from you about what happens next.

Kind regards

Christi

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