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Dear Allen,
I don't know if you will consider this topic, but it is the subject I
want to talk to the man I am in love with. We are two middle aged
people who began an affair about eight months ago. We worked together
up to this past month. We negotiate union contracts and have worked
together on a daily basis. Neither one of us were looking for anything
when we found each other. Neither one of us is in a situation to
divorce our mates. Too many years, too many kids, too much family! But we have found each other and we make each other very happy! He makes me feel 18 again and like somebody loves me again.
We had offices across from each other and would have M&M wars (candy)
where we would throw them at each other to act as sort of exclamation
points to our conversations. He is convinced he would die in my car
because of the way I drive. I even took up golfing to spent some time
with him, but ended getting hurt both times I tried to golf. On one
occasion at a business related golf outing I sprained my ankle badly and
was on crutches for weeks. He took me to the hospital and worried about
me. He took care of me and even took me shopping when I needed to go.
He has had to return to his old job because of family commitments and we
miss each other terribly! We have cried together and laugher together.
I love his smile and my whole day brightens when I see it. He makes me
laugh and I love to hear him laugh. We share everything together. We
are both workaholics and finding time together has become difficult
now. We are supposed to be competitors now. But he has been my mentor and best friend and lover.
He struggles perhaps more than I about this relationship. We have
talked about ending it, described all the right and proper reasons, but
just can't move away from each other. I want to convince him that he is
entitled to be happy too. He tells me that if somebody were to look at
the book of his life, he does not know how I would fit into that. I try
to convince him I just want to be the last chapter that only he knows
about that brought joy and happiness to him. The one he will read over
and over in his old age and smile!
I don't know if you can do this. Most people would not approve, I was
one of those people for all of my 46 years, until this past year. I
can't imagine my life with this man gone now, and I don't want to be
just friends with him.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, hope you can help me find the
words to let him know he should follow his heart.
Barb
| Hey, I've got something to say, just give new love a start, forget the guilt ridden trip, and go on, follow your heart. I know it's so difficult, there's the kids and the wife, I'm not asking for you to give that up, and start a brand new life. But life wasn't meant to be easy, and a life is such a long, long time, hard to make some words fit, its sometimes hard to make them rhyme. But I can't imagine life, without having you, oh so near, can't imagine what it would be like, its something I've learnt to fear. And now I know your decision, is one of those painful choices, damned if do and damned if you don't, I can already hear those voices. We have cried and laughed together, oh, how I love to see you smile, and I will be so understanding, if you can only hold me a while. But life is not forever, and you need to grab it when you can, it's hard being faithful, so hard to be a faithful man. But life is what it is, very few have mastered the art, and all I'll ever ask you, is please, just follow your heart. |
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